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Archive for November, 2009

The Following Story is Fictional and Does Not Depict Any Actual Person or Event

There is a political party known as “Make Chinese Angry” (MCA in short).

The party was broken into 2 forces lead by Kong (president) and Chuah (deputy president).

Kong didn’t like Chuah (because Chuah is 60 but still got a young chick?)

Kong kept Chuah at sideline even he is officially voted as the deputy president.

Chuah was not assigned any minister post in cabinet.

Chuah felt like a bangla working in a toilet in AEON Kepong.

Chuah boiled to 70 degree Celcius.

Kong never stopped. Kong attacked Chuah again and again publicly.

Chuah boiled to 90 degree Celcius, feeling like a gigolo that get paid only RM25.

Later, Kong chopped down Chuah head by sacking him from MCA and remove his deputy president post!

The excuse given was that Chuah let “his friend” sucked his cock 3 times in a single day.

Chuah boiled to 10,000 degree Celcius!!!

Chuah said, “Tiger doesn’t fight and you thought I am a sick cat?!” [老虎不发威你当我病猫?]

Tiger Chuah challenged King Kong with an EGM. King Kong accepted the challenge.

2,300+ MCA delegates needed to vote for 3 resolutions.

Resolution #1 – No Confidence against King Kong .

Resolution #2 – Restore Tiger Chuah as MCA member.

Resolution #2 – Restore Tiger Chuah as Deputy President.

The fight between Kong and Chuah was 50-50 because both command half the empire.

Fearless Kong announced publicly many times that if he is voted out, he will resign.

Like Manchester vs Liverpool, this war is much anticipated.

Manchester fans want Manchester to win. Liverpool fans want Liverpool to win.

It is either you die or I die. One hill cannot have 2 tigers.

2,307 delegates voted on 10 – 10 – 09.

Resolution #1 – Passed! No Confidence to Kong ! By a margin of only 14 votes (0.61%!)

Kong said, “Fucked!”

Tiger Chuah smiling, “Kekekekekeke!”

Resolution #2 – Passed! Tiger Chuah is restored as MCA member. By a margin of 109 votes (4.7%)

Kong said, “FUCKED!”

Tiger Chuah laughing, “HAHAHAHAHAHA!”

It looked like King Kong have to step down and surrender his kingdom to Chuah.

But then…

Resolution #3 – Failed! Tiger Chuah is NOT restored as deputy president! By a margin of 74 votes (3.2%)

Tiger Chuah, “WHAT THE FUCKED?!”

Isn’t this suppose to be you die or I die?

How come it ended up both die?

If Kong has to step down and Chuah is not restored his leadership, that means both lost in the war.

It is like both Manchester and Liverpool are disqualified for the championship.

“No one” expected these results (actually some are expecting it!).

They call them the third force.

bird-clam

Chinese says, “Bird fight with clam, fisherman get both!” [鹬蚌相争,渔人得利]

Clam taking naked sun bath.

Bird came to kiss sexy clam.

Clam kissed back bird’s plastic mouth.

Both engaged in French kissing.

Fisherman came, took both home to cook soup.

The fisherman is the third force.

But no one knew exactly who is the fisherman in MCA.

What is the motive of the fisherman? There were 2 guesses.

Guess #1 – Some “hero” members wanted to rescue MCA. They wanted to remove both problematic leaders to solve the fight of the party. Which is a good motive.

Guess #2 – The fisherman wanted to “borrow force” to become the new king. Which is an ugly motive.

The fisherman never show up. So everyone thought it “must” be Guess #1.

Tiger Chuah asked Kong to honor his words and resign.

But good movies always have many turning points and surprises.

If the first surprise is the poll results, the second “unexpected” is the thickness of Kong ’s face.

Kong decided not to resign!

But you can’t blow him. According to the constitutions, he can only be removed by over 66.6% votes.

Not By 50.4%!

Chuah very unhappy.

But King Kong is unhappy too.

He is heavily criticized. He no longer could show his usual ego face.

Later Kong promoted Leow (his first general in his Kong Gang) to become the deputy president.

He thought General Leow is in his “team”.

Leow is supposed to be Kong’s man.

But General Leow is not happy!!!

Leow asked Kong to respect the results of the votes.

The results ask both leaders “to go”.

Later Leow became impatient.

The “asking” became “attacking”.

Leow attacked Kong of not keeping his promise.

He also attacked Kong as being crazy for power.

Kong said Leow is not loyal and thankful to him.

General Leow is supposed to be in Kong’s gang, who is supposed to pledge full loyalty to the King (Kong).

But the truth is, while the King just lost a battle, his general is hungry for his seat!

If King Kong and Tiger Chuah step down, Leow, as the first general will be automatically selected as the new King!

The funny thing is, in all pictures and TV appearances, Leow was showing his upset face all the time due to the lost of his gang (Kong’s gang).

But deep inside his heart, he is just too excited to be the new king!

But he need to change his spectacles because he didn’t notice the thickness of Kong’s face earlier.

There is a high probability that General Leow is the real fisherman (even he is not, he will be assumed as).

It make all sense for him to betray his King in the EGM!

If his King is still in power after the EGM, he is still the general.

If his King and his enemy lose, he becomes the King!

Even if the enemy win, he won’t lose big too since he can simply joins the enemy.

So it is either a win, win a bit or WIN BIG!

All he needs is a few people to vote away Kong and Chuah to win BIG.

Maybe he is not smart enough to come out with this himself.

Some some smarter players must have teach him this “borrow knife to kill” strategy. [借刀杀人]

borrow-knife
[The note wrote, “Stupid Dog, By Cat”]

If he win, it is like winning without fighting. [不战而胜]

If no one expected the thickness of King Kong ’s face, no one would have expected the next turning point.

King Kong and Tiger Chuah decided to join force!

After their mortal combat, they actually decided to do real French kissing!

(more…)

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